Venting Thread, or FML!

[rockinwithrammstein]

I'm on bupropion or whatever it's called. Wellbutrin, I think? My doctor told me to tough it out last time I was in her office, so I'm hoping that maybe once I talk to her again, which will put me at the 6 week mark, she'll switch me back. I can't live like this. My kids don't deserve it.

When I told my therapist about her cutting me off cold turkey, he asked me if she was crazy, so I figured it must not have been a good idea.

One of the main side effects for bupropion is actually headaches! The effects may settle down in time, but you were probably better off on the zoloft anyway because it sounds like it was helping you to feel a bit more "normal".
And your therapist is right, it is crazy! When changing antidepressants you have to adjust the dosage slowly, or you end up suffering side effects from the sudden withdrawal. That could also have contributed to how you are feeling right now.

I wish I knew how to help other than to send love and hugs your way <3

Thanks Venting did make me feel a little better.

[QueenBex]

I hate money.

[QueenBex]

Damn, just cut my hand/wrist.
I just got everything I needed to finish my mosaic and do some more eventually. I'm tired, it's gone past 10pm, but I was excited, I was keen. I started and kinda noted how sharp my new cutters were making the tiles. I started to have an itch on my hand so I scratched it, glanced down and saw a red line, didn't really register, carried on and found the glue I got doesn't work. I scratch my hand again and look down to see a long cut pouring blood.

Must've been a sharp off cut flying across my hand or something.
I've cleaned it (damn you difficult to open antiseptic wipes!) and wrapped it up and have had my hand held over my head for about 15mins now, yep the left again, after catching my left thumb on the same mosaic not two weeks ago.

Now I'm just concerned as it was bleeding most from the end closest to my wrist. It's on the back of my hand though and I've had it above my head for a bit...

Sorry, it's probably ok, it wasn't as deep as my
thumb. It's difficult living on my own, I think with shocks there's still a part of us that want to run and cry to a parent or a relative or whoever is closest, can't do that when I'm on my own...

Spoiler

strange, i'm so ok when I self harm but not for these unexpected accidents :p

[rockinwithrammstein]

Damn, just cut my hand/wrist.
I just got everything I needed to finish my mosaic and do some more eventually. I'm tired, it's gone past 10pm, but I was excited, I was keen. I started and kinda noted how sharp my new cutters were making the tiles. I started to have an itch on my hand so I scratched it, glanced down and saw a red line, didn't really register, carried on and found the glue I got doesn't work. I scratch my hand again and look down to see a long cut pouring blood.

Must've been a sharp off cut flying across my hand or something.
I've cleaned it (damn you difficult to open antiseptic wipes!) and wrapped it up and have had my hand held over my head for about 15mins now, yep the left again, after catching my left thumb on the same mosaic not two weeks ago.

Now I'm just concerned as it was bleeding most from the end closest to my wrist. It's on the back of my hand though and I've had it above my head for a bit...

Sorry, it's probably ok, it wasn't as deep as my
thumb. It's difficult living on my own, I think with shocks there's still a part of us that want to run and cry to a parent or a relative or whoever is closest, can't do that when I'm on my own...

Spoiler

strange, i'm so ok when I self harm but not for these unexpected accidents :p

Spoiler

Must be kind of common. I don't self harm by cutting, but I dig at and pick at my skin with tweezers when I'm really stressed...but boy if I accidentally snag myself with something I hate the world.

Hugs <3 I hope your hand feels better soon.

[LinkIsMyHomeboy]

Started having an anxiety attack around 10 pm last night. Didn't fall asleep until nearly 1 am, tossed and turned, kept waking up and having trouble going back to sleep. Woke up today still in the midst of my attack, threw up at work, been fidgety and nervous and on the verge of tears all day. I really really effing hate anxiety attacks. I would much rather have a panic attack so this would be over. Thank goodness I have therapy on Monday. The bright spot in this is that I talked to my boss and I'm not on the phones today, just doing paperwork. Glad to be seen as an actual person rather than just a body in a chair.

[Livingdeadgirl]

sending love and hugs to you queen and link

Spoiler

Queen i feel the same way re. self harm vs accidents - can do whatever i want to this body on purpose but when accident strikes i break down

link i feel your anxiety vs panic attack too ! at least a panic attack can (((usually))) be dealt with in a easier/saner/faster method vs the anxiety that can linger and fester forever

i send love and hugs to you both .... crafts and deep breaths help me .... and MJ ... of course ... but maybe just getting it out on here will help ... i have too many issues to share or name .... but getting it out sometimes helps

if you two (or anyone) ever ever ever needs to chat PM me. . . i lurk on the site off and on all day everyday and part of the reason for that is its my only contact to humans.

<3 keep on rocking in the free world <3
moosette

[Livingdeadgirl]

I hate money.

2nd this

[rockinwithrammstein]

I think we're all in good company. Hope everyone starts to feel a bit better :/

[QueenBex]

Thanks guys, my hand is a bit better today, though I knocked it at volunteering today which caused it to bleed again. But seems ok again now. :p
More annoyed about the stupid glue not working now.

I can definitely relate Link. It's good when a boss/manager/teacher/parent gives you a break by doing the smallest of things. Unfortunate that so many people have no empathy at all or try and help but make it worse.

[Mishatu]

Yesterday morning was simply dreadful. Started off at 4:30 AM with a cat nudging me and meowing for attention. Little hard to sleep when you get a wet nose right in the small of your back >.> Then, someone messaged me on facebook, also wanting attention. I told him I was only awake because the cat wanted attention, and his response was "I'm not a cat!". Well, no duh. I wasn't talking about you.

Fast forward a bit to leaving for work. I head downstairs, realize I forgot my coat, run upstairs and grab it, head back downstairs, realize that my keys aren't in my coat pocket like they normally are, run upstairs to grab those, and finally get out to my car. I'm not even half a mile down the road when my car starts handling strangely. The road was rough, yes, but my car had never shuddered and jerked like it was doing. I get to a stop sign at the end of the street, throw the car into park and step out to see what's going on. Surprise! Flat tire. Zero hope of limping to work that's normally a 30 minute drive. I got back in, turned around, and went back to the bf's house. (Spoiler alert, driving on a completely shot tire for half a mile will leave a stench of burning rubber)

I ran inside, dropped my keys on the desk, and asked the bf if I could use his car since I had a flat. He blinked at me sleepily and said sure. Got back after work to see that he hadn't done anything to help get my car running while I was gone (it was an 8 hour shift; would have been nice if he'd done something). Switching out the busted tire with the spare turned out to be an ordeal, since apparently rust likes to keep things where they are, but we did get it done.

Today, we took the car to a tire shop to get it fixed. I was told it would take about 20 minutes to repair, so I figured I'd be able to make it back to campus in time for class. Instead, it took an hour, and I missed half of the two-hour lecture.

The good things in all of this: The weather wasn't terrible, so driving my bf's car went smoothly. I still got to work on time, although a little later than I prefer being. Also, the tire shop I went to not only had the exact tire I needed in stock, but it was gently used and they could charge $40 instead of $100.

The entire situation with the car has just been so stressful and exhausting, which doesn't compound well with late-term pharmacy school. I know things could have been worse, so I'm really quite thankful for the good things that happened and the little miracles like the tire being in stock. Anyways, I think I'm done ranting to lovely Sprite Stitchers. I know you guys also have lots of problems, and I appreciate your taking the time to read/respond to this. Many thanks from this psychotic chick!